Indoor Living

This modern world is failing me.

I want my world to be made up of feudal provinces, where humans and other beings (if possible) are forced to take up arms and become combatants; where famine and plague are part of every day life; where the average age of a person is late 20s to early 30s and the reason for death is attributed to war. I want war, I want it outside my doorstep, everyday. I also want the ability to eradicate it with more than just weapons made from resources, I want the abilities to come from within where the true measure of someones skills isn't by their physical technique but by the intangible techniques from within that are developed by wisdom and knowledge of arcane arts.

I want to be able to value bonds of friendship more than any other material object or anything of worth. I want to have the bare minimum and be in constant turmoil. I want to be surrounded by people that are following me, depending on me to bring them salvation and still have the power to at least give them hope. I want the ideas of trust and betrayal to matter the most, but not in this modern context of loyalties and talk, I want it to be to the death, knowing someone would lay down their life for you and vice versa. I want to be among the barbarians, where hatred blinds man's eyes and the stench of death is present where ever one walks. But, I guess, I want to be the one to protect those with me the most. As long as they're with me, I'll never be alone. That's what would make me happy, to never be alone, to always have one person by my side. I'd be happy, I'd smile, even though the world is constantly ravaged by greed cries bloody tears.

I have no fear of death, it just means dreaming in silence. A dream that lasts for eternity. No one can draw a clear line between sane and insane. You move that line as you see fit for yourself. No one else can. You'll understand soon that the one that's insane is this world. I guess I'm just looking for a door to open. I was dreaming, I knew it was a dream. I just don't want to open my eyes. From that time it's been like that, always.

Of the days that I have lived, only those I spent with you seemed real.

Goodbye, Horses.